Homestuck.XYZ 2.0

Are there any good matchups scenarios involving a Homestuck character in a Versus Battle Debate or Death Battle video? Any that intrique you.

The two I've mainly been bouncing around are Vriska Serket vs Wanda Maximoff (could go either way, Wanda's been buffed to hell and back lately, and the House of M stuff was made part of her normal arsenal) and The Beta Kids VS The Digidestined (Homestuck wins, but it's surprisingly close, Digimon is stronger then it looks and that's essentially 16 with humans and digimon. John is crucial here)

Would John fight Goku. Yes. Goku loves to fight strong opponenets and John would think some roughousing would be fun. Things would escalate from simple hand held hammer vs martial arts, to full on god powers on display.
That said, I don't think John would actually stand much of a chance. Goku's fighting style is much faster and physical, whereas John is more of an RPG Mage fighter, relying on individual, stronger spells or attacks. His only real defense to a flurry of blows would be to turn into wind, regroup, and try another attack from behind, or above. As much respect as Goku would have for John's strength, he might not even need to go ssj1 to keep egbert down. John's weather powers and wind manipulation might be able to toss Goku around in mid air or throw him off course, but on the ground, Goku's powerful physical ability would be more than enough to keep him in fighting form. Although it would be very interesting to see John somewhat move with the wind, becoming one with the tempest, letting him land several swift hammer hits, yet dodge oncoming attacks by moving fluidly around the strikes, unreachable as the wind. The only real response to this, I believe, would be some sort of energy beam or blast attack which would serve to sufficiently counteract the force of the wind with a powerful shockwave. While John's wind is certainly powerful, I don't think we really see it come up against anything that would resist it like this.
I think John Egbert could beat Krillin.

Dave Strider could probably beat Pearl Splatoontwo at a rap battle, but I think that's just because she's not geared that well towards improvised freestyle.

I believe a gardening based battle between Hana from Wolf Children and Jade Harley from Homestuck would be inconclusive but interesting. Jade brings a lot to the table, but her methods are very sterile. Not only are her plants growin in a greenhouse, but Jade herself grew up alone. Everything she developed and applied towards the growth of her plants, she did so in isolation. She learned In Vitro, rather than In Vivo. Hana, I would say, approached gardening in much the same way. She was an excellent study and worked very diligently with the resources she had, books and writing, yet discovered that it wasn't necessarily enough when working out in the earth and soil, working with nature itself. Only with the help of others, others who knew the land, had experience, had done the work and lessons before her, and who were happy to share their knowledge with her, was she able to find her feet, and even flourish in her new environment. Not only that, but Jade's botany was more of a hobby, a curiousity or past time, whereas Hana's gardening was a matter of life or bankruptcy, not only for herself but for her children. Her family.
Jade would be more than capable of creating a pumpkin as big as a car in her lab, with complete control of nutrients, temperature, solar exposure, and atmosphere, but she would be lost working an open field for the first time. Like Hana, she definitely does not shy away from hard work, but alone she doesn't know where to direct that work. At best her results are held back by the learning curve, at worst, she resorts to extreme measures more comfortable to her (setting up an automatic nuclear powered laser defense grid for example) and tries to recreate lab conditions in nature through sheer force of effort. I think they would come together in the end, though, helping with each other's crops. Hana trying to impart everything she had learned from her neighbors and friends to Jade, and supplementing whatever she missed with helpful visits to and from the neighbors themselves. Jade would get the opportunity to meat a wide variety of people, with an even wider variety of perspectives, opinions, experiences and histories, about both gardening and life. A funny girl, but not impolite, I imagine she'd be perfectly welcome to these visits, not only as Hana's interesting guest.
Also because her children were wolves Hana wouldn't be confused about the furry thing.

Mort from KC Green's Anime Club comics Vs Karkat Vantas from Homestuck on the battlefield of an internet forum flame war
I feel like they would both get themselves permabanned after a long and agonizing campaign deeply annoying for everyone else involved, but I think Karkat has a sliver of a chance of avoiding a permanent ban. Karkat's main flaw is more that he will not let something go, not let something pass by, even if it's the weakest of bait he'll bite it, and bite it for hours and paragraphs. He's more Reactive, where Mort seems to be much more motivated by his sense of superiority and smugness. Where Karkat can be self aware in a very, roundabout way, Mort is incapable of this. And he sort of sucks more and is just. The worst.

Mark form KC Green's Anime Club vs Karkat Vantas from Homestuck would basically enter a holding pattern. Constantly sniping at one another and publishing paragraphs of rebuttals to each other's posts and replies, but they'd never really cross the line into being so obnoxious for the other users to warrant banning. A myriad of things could throw this balance in one direction or another, maybe one rallies behind the wrong cause, or supports a figure who turns out to be a more toxic force themselves, but in isolation they'd be more or less at stalemate.

A battle between Broly (Dragon Ball Z) VS Lord English (Homestuck) would be a fun fight of big powerful green guys.

Broly would start off winning, probably killing LE mutable times. However, LE's immortality would eventually wear Broly down. To speed up the process, all Lord English would have to do is bite Broly using the poison in his tooth to slow Broly down and eventually kill him. I honestly think Lord English would win. His immortality is just too tuff for Broly to deal with. The only way I see Broly winning is if he could do something akin to do the hakai. In the end, Lord English's immortality and other tricks would eventually make Broly let his guard down and let LE go for the kill.

Another battle I have been thinking up is Kanaya (Homestuck) VS Denji (Chainsaw Man) A battle between two chainsaw users.

This one would be close but I think Denji would be able to outlast Kanaya. It depends on whether it's a fight to the death or a fight to KO. If it's a fight the death Denji would win no question. But, if it's by KO or some kind of ring-out system then Kanaya has a chance. A question that I am unsure of is whether their respective blood-drinking healing ability would work. I'm am pretty sure that Kanaya would be able to drink Denji's blood but perhaps his devil blood would not work with a rainbow drinker. The same thing goes for Denji, could a troll's blood still heal him? It is hard to say both of them have unique blood. Overall, Denji would probably win Kanaya could outspeed and outsmart him at first but, I think Denji would eventually get the upper hand and win.

Kanaya seems to only fight other players by flipping her shit and going crazy and killing the instantly. I dont think she could sustain a fight against denji at all. I reckon Kanaya gets the jump on him and Denji probably survives the initial attack and then kills him.

Id think different if Kanaya was an adult -adult trolls seem to become much more physically powerful. Denji would have trouble when his opponent is literally physically a world ahead of him.

I'd love to see Dave vs. Parappa the Rapper, actually you know what eff that
Dirk vs. Canibus would be absolutely fkn legendary (or I guess that would be Andrew Hussie vs. Canibus?... lmao.. Dirk Strider versus Rip The Jacker)

We all know Goku would whoop John easily, but I do like the idea of LE versus Broly, or any DB character really, he's easily the only one in Homestuck who's written at "that level" of power.

Edit: you know what a First Guardian vs a Saiyan would be an interesting fight to say the least.


Gimme Equius and Nepeta pre-Sgrub versus the villains in One Piece's East Blue (though idek how much tougher they actually got in the session, it doesn't seem like much). Really, I just wanna see Equius beat the shit out of Morgan, but here goes. Buggy might pull something shady with explosives, and Nepeta can't do much with her claws, but Equius prolly too STRONG for him to handle. She would tear apart Captain Kuro in a catfight, with a good deal of difficulty. Don Kreig would give Equius a run for his money, and ultimately the moirail team will have been too worn out by then to not get thwomped by Arlong.

I'm just saying in a battle between goku and aradia i honestly wouldnt be able to tell you who'd win.

Whatthevec wrote: ↑

Mon Jun 06, 2022 1:47 am

I'm just saying in a battle between goku and aradia i honestly wouldnt be able to tell you who'd win.

that would be a hella close fight. while Goku can brake time or whatever the hell he did when fighting Hit. Aradia could probably just freeze him in time again. But then again it's Goku were talking about. overall I think Goku would just barely win and honestly Aradia could probably run away successfully if needed. Although I doubt that either of them would kill the other and in the end they would probably become friends of some kind.

I would LOVE to see Dave Strider against Kanye in a rap battle even imagining it is making me laugh my ass off rn

I just thought of a super obvious one. Feferi (Homestuck) vs Aquaman (DC), two sea royal duking it out. I don't really know much about Aquaman but i still think he would win pretty easily, unless of course Feferi is god tier. Although now that I'm thinking about it more it might be better for Aquaman (DS) vs The Condesce (Homestuck) (early) would probably be a closer battle. When I say early I just mean before she gets all her life stealing stuff. But yeah ether battle would be an interesting battle to witness.

Another battle I've been half-baking for awhile is Dave Strider (Homestuck) VS Diavolo (Jojo). Two red bi boys with time powers. I think that Dave is has a lot more battle prowess however Dave does not really have anyway to see Diavolo's King Crimson. That is the real edge that Diavolo has. On time powers I'm pretty sure Dave would be able to find a way around King Crimson's time skipping. But I think Epithet will probably give Dave some trouble however in the end I think Dave is fast and powerful enough to take him out. But I think that it is very possible for Diavolo to some how out smart Dave into a quick death. Something like luring him with a monologue while King Crimson sneaks up behind him and boom, but if he just dies like that then it might not be a heroic or just death. Overall I think Dave is the more likely to win but Diavolo still has a pretty good shot.

My hand slipped and i made this. oops